[Eminem]
A lot of people ask me.. stupid fuckin questions
A lot of people think that.. what I say on records
or what I talk about on a record, that I actually do in real life
or that I believe in it
Or if I say that, I wanna kill somebody, that..
I'm actually gonna do it
or that I believe in it
Well, shit.. if you believe that
then I'll kill you
You know why?
Cuz I'm a

CRIMINAL
CRIMINAL
You god damn right
I'm a CRIMINAL
Yeah, I'm a CRIMINAL

[Eminem]
My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge
That'll stab you in the head
whether you're a fag or lez
Or the homosex, hermaph or a trans-a-vest
Pants or dress - hate fags? The answer's "yes"
Homophobic? Nah, you're just heterophobic
Starin at my jeans, watchin my genitals bulgin (Ooh!)
That's my motherfuckin balls, you'd better let go of em
They belong in my scrotum, you'll never get hold of em
Hey, it's me, Versace
Whoops, somebody shot me!
And I was just checkin the mail
Get it? Checkin the 'male'?
How many records you expectin to sell
after your second LP sends you directly to jail?
Right, Ken? Give me an amen (AAA-men!)
Please Lord, this boy needs Jesus
Heal this child, help us destroy these demons
Oh, and please send me a brand new car
And a prostitute while my wife's sick in the hospital
Preacher preacher, fifth grade teacher
You can't reach me, my mom can't neither
You can't teach me a goddamn thing cause
I watch TV, and Comcast cable
and you ain't able to stop these thoughts
You can't stop me from toppin these charts
And you can't stop me from droppin each March
with a brand new cd for these fuckin retards
Duhhh, and to think, it's just little ol' me
Mr. "Don't Give A Fuck," still won't leave

Chorus: Eminem (repeat 2X)

I'm a CRIMINAL
Cuz every time I write a rhyme, these people think it's a crime
to tell em what's on my mind - I guess I'm a CRIMINAL
but I don't gotta say a word, I just flip em the bird
and keep goin, I don't take shit from no one

[Eminem]
My mother did drugs – malt liquor, cigarettes, and speed
The baby came out - disfigured, ligaments indeed
It was a seed who would grow up just as crazy as she
Don't dare make fun of that baby cause that baby was me
I'm a CRIMINAL - an animal caged who turned crazed
But how the fuck you sposed to grow up when you weren't raised?
So as I got older and I got a lot taller
My dick shrunk smaller, but my balls got larger
I drink malt liquor to fuck you up quicker
than you'd wanna fuck me up for sayin the word ...
My morals went thhbbpp when the president got oral
Sex in his Oval Office on top of his desk
Off of his own employee
Now don't ignore me, you won't avoid me
You can't miss me, I'm white, blonde-haired
and my nose is pointy
I'm the bad guy who makes fun of people that die
in plane crashes and laughs
As long as it ain't happened to him
Slim Shady, I'm as crazy as Em
-inem and Kim combined - *kch* the maniac's in
Replacin the doctor cause Dre couldn't make it today
He's a little under the weather, so I'm takin his place
(Mm-mm-mmm!) Oh, that's Dre with an AK to his face
Don't make me kill him too and spray his brains all over the place
I told you Dre, you should've kept that thang put away
I guess that'll teach you not to let me play with it, eh?
I'm a CRIMINAL

[Interlude Skit]

Aight look (uh huh) just go up in that motherfucker
get the motherfuckin money and get the fuck up outta there

[Em]
Aight
I'll be right here waitin on you

[Em] Aight
Yo Em

[Em] What?!
Don't kill nobody this time

[Em] Awwright... god damn, fuck...
(whistling) how you doin'?
[Teller] HI, how can I help you?

[Eminem] Yeah I need to make a withdrawl

[Teller] Okay

[Eminem] Put the fuckin money in the bag bitch
and I won't kill you!
[Teller] What? Oh my god, don't kill me

[Eminem] I'm not gonna kill you bitch, quit lookin around...

[Teller] Don't kill me, please don't kill me...

[Eminem] I said I'm not gonna fuckin kill you
Hurry the fuck up! {*BOOM*} Thank you!

[Eminem]
Windows tinted on my ride when I drive in it
So when I rob a bank, run out and just dive in it
So I'll be disguised in it
And if anybody identifies the guy in it
I'll hide for five minutes
Come back, shoot the eyewitness
Fire at the private eye hired to pry in my business
Die, bitches, bastards, brats, pets
This puppy's lucky I didn't blast his ass yet
If I ever gave a fuck, I'd shave my nuts
tuck my dick inbetween my legs and cluck
You motherfuckin chickens ain't brave enough
to say the stuff I say, so this tape is shut
Shit, half the shit I say, I just make it up
To make you mad so kiss my white naked ass
And if it's not a rapper that I make it as I'm a be
a fuckin rappest in a Jason mask

(Chorus 2X)

Intro:
"Scalpel." "Here." "Sponge."
"Here" "Wait he's convulsing!" "Ah"
"He's convulsing!" "Oh my" "We're gonna have to shock him!"
"Oh my God!" "We're gonna have to shock him!" "Oh my God!"
Verse 1:
These are the results of a thousand electric volts
A neck with bolts "Nurse we're losing him check the pulse!"
A kid who refused to respect adults
Wore spectacles with taped frames and a freckled nose.
A corny lookin' white boy, scrawny and always ornery,
Cause I was always sick of brawny bullies pickin' on me.
And I might snap, one day just like that
I decided to strike back and flatten every tire on the bike rack.
My first day in junior high, this kid said,
"Just you and I, three o'clock sharp this afternoon you die"
I looked at my watch it was one twenty (1:20),
"I already gave you my lunch money what more do you want from me?!?"
He said, "Don't try to run from me, you'll just make it worse..."
My palms were sweaty, and I started to shake at first.
Something told me, "Try to fake a stomach ache it works"
I screamed, "O My appendix feels like make it burst!
Teacher, teacher, quick I need a naked nurse!"
"What's the matter?" "I don't know, my leg, it hurts!"
"Leg?!? I thought you said it was your tummy?!?"
"Oh, I mean it is, but I also got a bum knee!"
"Mr. Mathers, the fun and games are over.
And just for that stunt, you're gonna get some extra homework."
"But don't you wanna give me afterschool detention?"
"Nah, that bully wants to beat your ass and I'ma let him"
Chorus:
Brain damage, ever since the day I was born
drugs, what they used to say I was on
They say I never knew which way I was goin'
but everywhere I go they keep playin' my song X2
Brain damage
Verse 2:
Waitin' for my baby daughter Hailey,
I was harassed daily by this fat kid named D'Angelo Bailey.
An eighth grader who acted obnoxious, cause his father boxes,
so everyday he'd shove me in the lockers.
One day he came in the bathroom while I was pissin',
And had me in the position to beat me into submission.
He banged my head against the urinal til he broke my nose,
Soaked my clothes in blood, grabbed me and choked my throat.
I tried to plead and tell him, "We shouldn't beef"
But he just wouldn't leave, he kept chokin' me and I couldn't breathe.
He looked at me and said, "You gonna die honky!"
The principal walked in and started helping him stomp me.
I made them think they beat me to death,
Holdin' my breath for like five minutes before they finally left.
Then I got up and ran to the janitor's storage booth.
Kicked the door hinge loose and ripped out the four inch screws.
Grabbed some sharp objects, brooms, and foreign tools.
"This is for every time you took my orange juice,
Or stole my seat in the lunchroom and drank my chocolate milk.
Every time you tipped my tray and it dropped and spilt.
I'm gettin' you back bully! Now once and for good.
I cocked the broomstick back and swung hard as I could,
And beat him over the head with it til I broke the wood.
Knocked him down, stood on his chest with one foot.
Made it home later that same day.
Started reading the comics, and suddenly everything became gray.
I couldn't even see what I was trying to read.
I went deaf, and my left ear started to bleed.
My mother started screamin', "What are you on, drugs?!?
Look at you, you're gettin' blood all over my rug!" (Stop!)
She beat me over the head with the remote control,
Opened a hole and my whole brain fell out of my skull.
I picked it up and screamed, "Look bitch, what have you done?!?"
"Oh my God, I'm sorry son" "Shut up you cunt!"
I said, "Fuck it!" Took it and stuck it back up in my head,
then I sewed it shut and put a couple of screws in my neck.
Chorus
It' brain damage I got brain damage
It's brain damage It's probably brain damage (fade to end)

[Eminem]
Sometimes I just feel like, quittin I still might
Why do I put up this fight, why do I still write
Sometimes it's hard enough just dealin with real life
Sometimes I wanna jump on stage and just kill mics
And show these people what my level of skill's like
But I'm still white, sometimes I just hate life
Somethin ain't right, hit the brake lights
Case of the stage fright, drawin a blank like
Da-duh-duh-da-da, it ain't my fault
Great then I falls, my insides crawl
and I clam up (wham) I just slam shut
I just can't do it, my whole manhood's
just been stripped, I have just been vicked
So I must then get, off the bus then slip
Man fuck this shit yo, I'm goin the fuck home
World on my shoulders as I run back to this 8 Mile Road

[Chorus]
I'm a man, I'ma make a new plan
Time for me to just stand up, and travel new land
Time to really just take matters into my own hands
Once I'm over these tracks man I'ma never look back
(8 Mile Road) And I'm gone, I know right where I'm goin
Sorry momma I'm grown, I must travel alone
And go follow the footsteps I'm makin my own
Only way that I know how to escape from this 8 Mile Road

[Eminem]
I'm walkin these train tracks, tryin to regain back
the spirit I had 'fore I go back to the same crap
To the same plant, and the same pants
Tryin to chase rap, gotta move ASAP
And get a new plan, momma's got a new man
Poor little baby sister, she don't understand
Sits in front of the TV, buries her nose in the pad
And just colors until the crayon gets dull in her hand
While she colors her big brother and mother and dad
Ain't no tellin what really goes on in her little head
Wish I could be the daddy that neither one of us had
But I keep runnin from somethin I never wanted so bad!
Sometimes I get upset, cause I ain't blew up yet
It's like I grew up, but I ain't grow me two nuts yet
Don't gotta rep my step, don't got enough pep
The pressure's too much man, I'm just tryin to do what's best
And I try, sit alone and I cry
Yo I won't tell no lie, not a moment goes by
That I don't pray to the sky, please I'm beggin you God
Please don't let me be bitchin holdin no regular job
Yo I hope you can hear me homey wherever you are
Yo I'm tellin you dawg I'm bailin this trailer tomorrow
Tell my mother I love her, kiss baby sister goodbye
Say whenever you need me baby, I'm never too far
But yo I gotta get out there, the only way I know
And I'ma be back for you, the second that I blow
On everything I own, I'll make it on my own
Off to work I go, back to this 8 Mile Road

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
You gotta live it to feel it, you didn't you wouldn't get it
Or see what the big deal is, why it wasn't the skillest
To be walkin this borderline of Detroit city limits
It's different, it's a certain significance, a certificate
of authenticity, you'd never even see
But it's everything to me, it's my credibility
You never seen heard smelled or met a real MC
who's incredible upon the same pedestal as me
But yet I'm still unsigned, havin a rough time
Sit on the porch with all my friends and kick dumb rhymes
Go to work and serve MC's in the lunchline
But when it comes crunch time, where do my punchlines go
Who must I show, to bust my flow
Where must I go, who must I know
Or am I just another crab in the bucket
Cause I ain't havin no luck with this little Rabbit so fuck it
Maybe I need a new outlet, I'm startin to doubt shit
I'm feelin a little skeptical who I hang out with
I look like a bum, yo my clothes ain't about shit
if the Salvation Army tryin to salvage an outfit
And it's cold, tryin to travel this road
Plus I feel like I'm on stuck in this battlin mode
My defenses are so up, but one thing I don't want
is pity from no one, the city is no fun
There is no sun, and it's so dark
Sometimes I feel like I'm just bein pulled apart
I'm torn in my limbs, by each one of my friends
It's enough to make me just wanna jump out of my skin
Sometimes I feel like a robot, sometimes I just know not
what I'm doin I just blow, my head is a stove top
I just explode, the kettle gets so hot
Sometimes my mouth just overloads the ass that I don't got
But I've learned, it's time for me to U-turn
Yo it only takes one time for me to get burned
Ain't no fallin no next time I meet a new girl
I can no longer play stupid or be immature
I got every ingredient, all I need is the courage
Like I already got the beat, all I need is the words
Got the urge, suddenly it's a surge
Suddenly a new burst of energy is occured
Time to show these free world leaders the three and a third
I am no longer scared now, I'm free as a bird
Then I turn and cross over the median curb
Hit the verbs and all you see is a blur from 8 Mile Road

[Chorus]